As any American should, I do pray for our president during his illness even though he thoroughly disgusts me as a human being (apologies to my Republican brothers and sisters, but I have never liked the man), he is our president like it or not. I am first and always, an American. It does us NO good to wish ill upon another. My ancestors came to this land before the Revolution, were decidedly NOT slave owners, and have fought in most of our numerous wars. That being said, I will not delve into political matters which tend to separate us like our monied masters would have us do. No matter your political persuasion, YOU are the worker bees and I am your champion. Thanks for your massive support, friendship, encouragement and solidarity. May we ALL find a way to come together for the common good,whatever it may be.
As I drove my bus this Friday of mine, my thoughts were obviously geared toward the reward of my looming vacation week. Still, I forced myself to remain on task. After over 3,000 presses of the brake pedal, my right foot and arthritic big toe complained with each application but I worked hard to keep my Gillig as smooth as a virginal tail feather. More attention was given to scanning, catching several bonehead maneuvers of the less-professional motorists who assail the roadways. All I could think of was the wisdom of our wise trainer Mike Bishop, who has regaled many of us with his recollection ofan operator pulling into his road relief, looking forward to his impending vacation instead of focusing, then knocking over a pedestrian in a crosswalk. Any operator's worst nightmare: a momentary lapse of reason (thanks, "Floyd") putting a depressing dent in a long-awaited week of freedom.
"Don't be that guy," Mike is fond of saying. Yeah, brother, I get it.
All day as I drove, and for several prior, I've had this thought for a blog post. Your Deke has been a bit bland lately, and I've been called out on this point. Why? Perhaps a bit of Deke Fatigue, or Occupational Weariness (OW!) has dulled my typographically-literate prowess. Whatever. I'm fucking TIRED, okay? 2020 has been a bummer for everyone, me (and my brothers/sisters) included. This job is normally draining at the least; during a pandemic/BLM Central/fire disastrous year, it has been compounded to the nth degree ad infinitum. Fun has been rare as an honest politician. Nevertheless, this post has been gurgling in the recesses of my cranial arteries. Let's see what happens...
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HAVE YOU EVER...? I have.
- Spit at the mirror and thrown your toothbrush in the sink?
- Told an incoming passenger "Have a great day" while saying "Hello, welcome to my bus" to a departing one?
- Accidentally-on-purpose returned a one-finger salute while on duty?
- Watched a known trouble-causer prepare to board your bus, then told him "Hey, is that your $20 bill blowing away?"; shut the door and driven off as he flurries about looking for it?
- Been daydreaming about telling your brother which direction to exit a freeway to find your house, then drive your bus that way instead of staying on-route to your end point? Then, realizing your mistake cannot be easily-remedied, flipping a six-lane U-turn?
- Having driven a similar run on the extra board earlier in the day, finding yourself following the same route and missing a turn, only to be corrected by an aware passenger and having to apologize for an impromptu reroute?
- Suffered an oversleep because at the beginning of a signup, you fail to note the run you once drove has changed, and picks up a block away at the same time you drove it previously?
- Pushed the wrong turn signal pulling out of a stop, only to have following traffic screech to a halt with horns blaring?
- Told a departing passenger how to get somewhere, only to realize 10 minutes later you gave them instructions that would take 30 minutes longer than what the correct answer would have? (Note to passengers: always trust a fellow passengers' directions rather than a bus operator's.)
- Encountered a fellow operator you've known for years, cemented a friendship over a signup and spoke of many personal matters, only to forget their name and say another's by mistake the next time you see them?
- Said something horribly politically-incorrect to a passenger who took great offense?
- Run over a squirrel and sang to yourself, guiltily, "Another One Bites the Dust"?
Yes folks, your Deke is a dork. A big one, sometimes. I confess. Surely, you fellow operators have similar stories to share. I would LOVE to see them! We're only human, or half-so to our respective managements.
I love you all. To date, FTDS has garnered over 476,000 Hits, which is amazing to me given that when I published "JUST DRIVE - Life in the Bus Lane" almost three years ago it was 300,000 less. Bless you all for sticking with me this long. I deserve less, I'm sure. Stay safe out there, y'all. Forgive the indentation accidents; Blogger's new format SUCKS big-time, but I'm sure they don't care.
Here's a story for you.
ReplyDeleteI was riding a bus from downtown out to an area mall one morning. The route operates along one of our major expressways, then exits to cross the river, hit a local street to serve a major bus loop (serving 7 other bus routes), then crosses the river again to get back on the expressway to continue west. This route and one other do this same move in both directions.
So after we served the loop, we go back across the river. I'm half dozing, along with most of us on board and don't realize which lane we're in until somebody says "Hey, we're going to the mall, right?" That is when I come awake and see we're in the left lane of the bridge, about to take the ramp to the expressway heading back downtown!
Operator: "Oh crap!"
Nothing to do but continue onto the expressway, and get off at the next exit a couple miles down, and cross under to get back on heading west again!!
Oh, and have you ever.... poured the orange juice onto your pancakes instead of in the glass when you meant to get the syrup?